The Dark Side

Like it or not, my city is still heavily segregated. Certain parts of town are heavily white, while others are heavily Latino, or heavily Black. 

On this day, I am installing cable in a section 8 apt. complex and this specific apartment is owned by an elderly African American woman. 

I am running cable around to the tv's in the rooms, and more specifically the bedroom. On the bed is two young black women. Feeling awkward I busily run the line.   The grandmother comes in and sits on the bed with the young women. I can feel the 3 women watching me. I look over my shoulder, and the grandmother asks me a question.
"Ever been with a black woman before?"
Caught off guard I blurt out "Nope."
"Want to?"
It had the distinct feeling of pimpery.  I could have pointed at one of the woman and said "Her."  but instead I gulped hard and started talking about how awesome my wife is. Their eyes rolled, and I continued my work and got out of there.

The Mexican and his Parrots

There is a house I have been to a couple times to fix/install things; an older 1st gen Mexican couple lives there. Their hobby is birds. They have several beautiful large parrots on perches around their house. The guy wears on on his shoulder.

I advise customer issue is coming from back bedroom, and ask is it ok if I go in there. Customer opens the door and while doing so says, "No, let me go get my parrot out of there, he likes to bite."

As soon as the word bite was uttered, my vision is filled with red flapping wing feathers and I feel a good pinch on the left side of my neck.

The damn bird flew out of the room, into my face, and bit me hard on the neck.   Left a good bird hickey, but no blood thank goodness.

First job of the morning

A cable guy has to be on site at 8:00am at one of his jobs. Most common is to find a disconnect or a quick connect near one's home to do. It is easy work to start the day on, and no customer contact.

I went to a quick connect, which is at the end of a circle ended dead end street. Circles provide minimal places to park, and as such I parked in the one spot that didn't block a driveway and was near the house I was to hook up. 

I clock in, get out, and put my cones of safety out. The neighbor pulls up into his driveway, gets out, and asks if he can help me. 

First job of the morning and still groggy. I stare at him for a second, and reply curtly, "No." Then I go about my business. 

No's anger people, that is why I love them.

Neighbor starts saying I can't park there. Me, busy getting on my tool belt and not looking at him, tells him yes, it is public property. I can park here. 
"How long you gonna be?"
"Oh, ten minutes."
"Well, I am going to put on a timer inside and you had better not be here in ten minutes."

I get done in about eight minutes, and then sit outside in my van doing my morning paperwork for another 10 just to piss him off.